One of the classes in my advanced coach training talked about relationships and how best to coach people around relationship challenges. Some of the content came from John Gottman's book "7 Principals That Make Marriage Work". Apparently, his research applies (with some language modifications) to relationships at work or those with friends and family members - so it's very powerful information.

What's particularly relevant of his research to coaching is that hey says that 69% of the issues in relationships are perpetual - meaning they happen time and time again. Boy what a great thing to work on with your coach. 

Here's a short video by John about his research. If you want more, check out Parts 2-4 or one of his longer videos on YouTube or pick up a copy of his book.

I love this Ted Talk by Atul Gawande. He speaks about how coaching can help anyone get better at anything. Why? He says because: Coaches are the external eyes and ears that provide a more accurate picture of your reality.

He uses many inspiring examples from his experience as a medical doctor both in the US and in his work with clinics overseas.

It's amazing how time flies. Is it really the end of 2017 already? This quote is a reminder of how important it is to go after what you really, really want before it's too late. It's one of the primary things we do in coaching...... help people achieve what they desire.

This video highlights some of the key principals we work with in coaching such as:

• Take the initiative to invest in yourself and your learning.
• Formulate a vision of what you want and seek it out.
• Focus on the small wins (so there may be lots of small steps to get there, so celebrate the small wins - my coaching perspective takeaway)
• If you flip a couple of key assumptions, you can change everything.

But what I love about the video are the great stories she shares. She presents examples of people who have used these principals to achieve amazing financial success doing the work they love. It's certainly worth 18+- min of your time.

In this short video, Dorie Clark, a well known author and personal branding expert, talks about a few ways to focus your own personal brand so you can stand out in the crowd. 

​Her book "Stand Out" is filled with case studies, the psychological research behind her views and a deeper explanation of her concepts. She also has some excellent, longer Youtube videos on the topic. Here are a few of my favorite takeaways from "Stand Out".

• "There is less room today for average performance in a global economy."
• "It's about solving problems and making a difference in a way that creates value for yourself and others."
• I love her explanation of Robert Cialdini's 6 steps to persuasion which are:
  1. Reciprocating
  2. Commitment and Consistency
  3. Social Proof
  4. Liking
  5. Authority
  6. Scarcity
• "When you also focus on how you can help them achieve their goals, you become not just a networker but a trusted friend and valuable colleague."
• "Always try to give value before you receive it."
• "....in this world, you are not trying to appeal to everyone, you're just trying to get to the right people." here she is quoting Alan Weiss, but it's a great reminder that we don't have to be everything to everybody.

Dorie Clark's book "Stand Out" is packed full if ideas on how to find your breakthrough idea and then become well know for it. But more importantly, she talks about why this is valuable to your business and your career. I highly recommend her book as well as her Youtube videos. 

I bring this up because it’s so much easier to go places with a “Wing(wo-)man” - someone who is outgoing and can make introductions. If you are a busy professional who avoids going to networking events, because walking into a room full of strangers is overwhelming, why not try enlisting the power of a “Wingman”? 

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​Chris Sant, an ex-commercial litigator, showed us how techniques used by lawyers to persuade juries apply to writing more persuasive proposals.  His powerful presentation was filled with clear examples, and engaging content. Here are a few of my favorite takeaways:

• It’s the perception not the reality that gets the point across
• Show. Don’t tell. Show your awards, patents and clients gushing about you.
• Speak to the jury [client] like a human not in legalese [industry jargon].
• Make your points memorable.
• Simplify. Have the confidence to make the point and move on.
• Rhymes confer extra validity. Do you remember OJ Simpson trial? “If the glove does not fit. You must acquit.”
• Metaphors are short cuts. They translate new information into experiences that you already have.

Don’t miss your chance to hear Chris speak at the APMP National Conference. Chris Sant, from Chris Sant Consulting, will present at 3 sessions; differentiation, developing content libraries and how to gather intelligence on clients and competitors.  

​Are you ready for your next career move but don’t know where to look? ​Pat Welch, the co-founder of Boly:Welch an Executive Search, Recruiting, Staffing and HR Consulting firm, recently spoke to CREW members. ​

Here are a few pearls of wisdom that she shared:

• Figure out what you want. If you don’t really know, write down all of the things you like doing and those you don’t. If that doesn’t clarify things, then work with a career or life coach.
• Once you know what you want, then consider what person in what company might want to hear from you. Then you can say this is what I want, why I could work for you, and how I would be a fit for your organization. 
• Connect with recruiters before you need them. Once you know what you want, let the recruiter know that although you are not looking right now, if they do come across your dream job, you’d definitely be interested.

Another pearl she offered the group is that not everyone gets their dream job. But she feels that:

• Happiness is not always about getting what you want, but it is about wanting what you have.
• Something in every job can bring you joy.
• If you want a certain job, just start doing it, help with it, or just learn allot about it, so you can eventually move into it.
• If you are bored, find ways to challenge yourself. Get better at your job. Be noticed for it. People will seek you out.
• If your job still isn’t challenging, then take up a foreign language or learn to play an instrument

What did she say was the #1 way to advance your career? Networking!  So get out and meet people. Build relationships. Be known for what you do. When you are ready to move, find people who work for firms you would love to work for and ask for an introduction.